324 d-range?

Sometimes my crappy PCCW cell phone gives a noise on Saturday mornings. A new SMS turns up and by opening it I get this message; 324 d-range!
It doesn’t mean that 324 are deranged, and the first time I received this message I was confused and couldn’t really relate to it. After some speculations I suddenly realized what it all meant. The code always comes from my friend Ralf, a German guy living here not too far away, and always enjoys his beer at our little watering hole; ‘the Dong”.
If you go back in the archive you will find a post called: “A completely new perspective”. This is about my new sport; Golf.
To make the story short, then I got a set of Golf clubs from another friend –Bruce – who moved house and had this set of clubs he never used and didn’t want to bring to his new place, so Ralf was sure that I wanted to take them. I did and so my golfing career could kick of.
Ralf took me to the driving range and taught me the first lesson; keep your left arm straight and focus on the ball, iron no. 7 and bang, the ball went ahead like a starting Boeing 707. Well sometimes it did, but mostly it just took a loop up in the air and landed 5 meters outside the box from where I tried my best to hit it, or it just skimmed the surface and stopped not even 50 meters out. “This wont even bring you onto the green.”
Yesterday I went again for the 3rd time, with Ralf as my coach. He isn’t really my coach, but he is the only one who has the patience to deal with me and my poor efforts, but I guess he enjoy that he can have a beer and sometimes tell me stuff like; “the ball went that way because you lifted your head” or “try from the ground, as you wont always have a tee”.
And then I try to follow his advice, as he is – I guess- a quite decent player, and he takes care of me, while I’m trying.
I started to practice to hit the ball and get it to go far in the direction I wanted. I used iron no 7, and at the end it seemed to go pretty decent, not like the first or second time when it tok some time to make it work. No this time all of my first 6 shots went wide and in the right direction and offcorse this gave me some satisfaction, so I just continued doing that.
“Well now try with this driver.” Ralf handed me a huge club. I put the ball on the tee, leveled the head of the club to the ball, placed my feet parallel, bend my knees and straightened my back and kept my eyes on the ball. Concentration. Breath deeply and look to where I wanted it to go –out there somewhere behind the 250 yard mark, then again eyes on the ball, backswing, keep my left arm straight and bend the wrist at the right moment BUT KEEP YOUR EYES ON THE BALL, and swing! With No. 7 I kind of had it, and now I was just waiting for the confirming sound of a perfect hit to fill my ears. But nothing, the ball just rolled of the tee and towards my feet. Ralf lowered his eyes, looked the other way and sat down.
It took my some time to get used to this new club, but it never became the same like no. 7 and I was afraid that I had to go through the same procedure with every of the 10 or so different clubs in my set.
I was about to give it up and return to no. 7 and the satisfaction of balls going wide.
“Now take no. 9 and hit the ball from the ground and make it go to about the 50 yard mark.” Ralf had a new idea. Unwillingly I found the iron and put the ball on the ground.
“Not hard this time, but try to control you swing.”
“Control my swing!” What did he mean by that, how could I do that when I didn’t even know if I could hit it from the ground?
I did my best doing all he’d told me, and; the ball went in a nice high loop in the direction of the mark and landed just behind it.
Must be beginners luck. But I got another ball down and the same procedure; feet parallel, eyes on the ball, bend the knees, straighten the back and swing.
“Pock” again straight direction towards the mark and landed just close in front of it.
Now I was starting to enjoy this and once I even hit the mark, like it was a game of dart and I was aiming for the bull’s eye. A couple of times it went wrong, bur mainly the ball went the direction and distance I wanted.
“Now take no.7, do nearly the same and go for the 100 mark, and don’t hit it much harder.”
Next task from coach Ralf.
But how can it then approach the 100 when I don’t hit it harder then for the 50 mark.
“It is another club and it does something different.”
I did what I was told to, and guess what?
Yes I had a success experience, and I will for sure reply and say yes, when my phone the next time spits out the message; “324 d-range.”